The Walmart Oath

When I was pregnant with my first child,

I would carefully observe other moms

in a store like Walmart or Target.

These moms probably were pretty at some point.

They might have had light in their eyes

a few months ago,

But now their eyes were glazed over

and their faces were twisted into

an expression that can only be described as

a mix of an anger, frustration

confusion and sleep exhaustion.

The one thing these moms all had in common

was a little person or two

or three in tow.

These little people had long since outgrown

the glory days of their bassinets and booties

and now doned light up tennis shoes

and the beginnings of one or two adult teeth.

They were curious two year olds, demanding four year olds

and often know it all seven year olds.

The tiredest of moms had a combination of all three

with her at one time.

I'd see these women,

but I didn't really seeeeee them.

I would pat my belly and smile

thinking I was way smarter than they were

and that I would never be dragging a screaming child

whose legs had turned to jello

down the frozen food aisle.

Never would my little cherub go into public

wearing pajamas, or a costume of any sort, or mismatched socks.

They'd never pull down displays,

scream for candy at the top of their lungs

or stick their tongues out at little old ladies

who came up to pinch their cheeks.

Nope!

My parenting skills would combat all of this.

After all I had read dozens of books

and had done my research on

how to raise delightful children.

It didn't take long for my bubble to burst.

I actually held it together pretty well with the

first little guy.

Except for a few knock down drag outs over

what fast food restaurant

we would go to

I'd say we had a pretty smooth first 20 months or so.

The addition of my second son brought

a little bit more of a challenge

because now I was out numbered.

During my days of wrangling my two little lion cubs,

we only had a few near unconscious grocery cart plunges,

about a million toy aisle freak outs,

some candy aisle fit throwing

and one or two display topples.

And I had read books!

Imagine how bad it would have been

had I not been well read!

Enter Princess number one.

She was such a good little baby,

and by "good" I mean

that I could bring her into the house in her carseat

and set her on the floor in the foyer

and she would not utter a peep until I had unloaded and put away

4.8 million bags of groceries.

That's good in my book!

But with the addition of baby number three

came the twisted face.

Inevitably, I was that mom in the store

with her hair thrown up in a ponytail

wearing a t-shirt and jeans,

chasing after three very mobile kids

and saying the same few phrases over and over.

"Don't touch that!"

"Get over here right now!"

"Don't throw that apple!"

"Stop pulling your sister's hair!"

"You are not gonna get a prize

if you don't staighten up!"

That last one works everytime I might add.

Well, if you say it 14 times in each aisle,

they will straighten up as soon as you buy the prize.

Somewhere along the line,

I stopped trying to be the perfect mother

with the most well behaved children

and just started enjoying them,

praying ALOT

and having a sense of humor.

When we were free of most of the antics

of my first three,

my husband and I decided that it would be

"fun"

to have one single baby on the tail end

of our reproductive years

(and by "end" I mean early 30's).

Just one little bundle to shower with love

and attention while the other three began to develope

interests of their own apart from mom and dad.

Enter Brendell.

You'd think,

being the veteran mom that I am,

that I would have shed my delusions over

how my child would be.

I imagined a little tu-tu clad princess

with golden ringletts

who was loved and adored by her older siblings.

Yeah, that lasted for approximately 21.5 months

and then her will kicked in!

Suddenly I found myself

"that mom" in the supermarket again.

Only this time,

I wasn't as spry as I had been in my twenties

and it only took one little tyrant

to twist my face up!

It took me a few years,

okay 7 years and a couple months,

but I suddenly was hit with a stroke of genius.

I developed

"The Walmart Oath".

Any store can be substituted,

because we all know that children are not

descretionary when it comes to where

they decide to throw a fit,

but Walmart seemed relateable to most moms.

Here is my sweet Princess Brendell Faith.

Darling isn't she?

But if I am not careful,

this.......

can turn into this....

which very quickly spirals down

to this.......

So to avoid public displays of

seven year old drama,

I have employed

"The Walmart Oath"

which Brendell must recite once

before we leave the house on any

shopping excursion

and twice if she's tired.





"I, Brendell Faith Cleary
do promise, promise, promise
to behave like a lady in the store.
I will not throw a fit, cross my arms,
stomp my foot,
give the stink eye,
stick out my tongue,
ask for something more than once,
roll my eyes,
annoy my siblings,
walk off in a huff,
cry, complain, whine,
sulk or pout.
I will walk beside my mom
and happily help her when she asks me to.
So help me
Hannah Montanna, Taylor Swift
and iCarly.
(God just seemed too sacred to use
in jest)

Sometimes it works
sometimes it doesn't.

The end.

rib searching

This kid is such a nut!

From the time he could talk,

he has brought so much laughter into our lives.

His comedic timing is dead on

and his humor is universal.

He's just naturally funny without

even having to try.

I was recently reminded of this when we stumbled upon

an old family website that I had built.

I hadn't posted to it since

Brendell was an infant,

but it's still there.

I have to share this story from 2001.

"The other night at dinner, one of the kids asked me how God made people.

I explained how God made Adam out of dust and then Eve from Adam's rib.

David also told them that boys have one less rib than girls.

I added that when the boys get married, it is like finding their other rib.

We told them that God had a perfect match out there for each of them

and that they would someday belong to someone just like David and I

belong to eachother.

Michael was very curious and asked, "Mom, who do I belong to?"

I told him that none of us knew right now who that girl would be but that

we would pray for her whenever we thought of it.

The next night at bedtime prayer I heard Michael say his usual

"Thank you God for everything you have done for me....."

but he ended it differently this time.

He said, "And take care of that girl that gots my other rib. Amen!"

Someday we will meet this special girl and I will tell her that Michael

has been praying for her since he was seven and boy is he

happy to have found his rib!"

*

At almost 17 years old,

he's definitely stepped up his rib search!

This story was a reminder to me to cover

both him and his future mate in prayer.

It's a very hard thing to be obedient

in a disobedient world,

but the payoff of self control is

monumental.

God has more blessings for us

than we can fathom

and his timing is perfect.

Hang in there son!

God knows who you belong to

and I'm certain that she is worth the wait!

Restoring Honor

Restore {verb} :

To bring back to a former, original or normal condition.

Honor {noun}:

Honesty, fairness or integrity in one's beliefs and actions.

I started listening to Glenn Beck on the radio

many years ago.

He would keep me company as I dropped Brendell off at

Happy Apple in Saint Marys, Ga.

His views intrigued me and while they were not

all exactly like mine,

he was saying things that no one else on the radio was saying

and he made me think.

When he joined Fox News I started watching him regularly

and while again, some of the things he said

did not exactly line up with what I hold to be true,

I still respected his knowlege of history

and his love for our country.

When we heard of the 8/28 rally
and what it's purpose was,
we thought about going.
When we heard that Sarah Palin was going to speak.
we knew we had to be there!



Living close to Washington DC is bonus in

such a time as this.

We sat with people who had traveled in from

North Carolina, Florida,

Ohio and even New Mexico!

The crowds were thick, but kind.

Excited, yet respectful.

Fired up, but not frenzied.

I was so proud to be there!

Observing the sea of people from all walks of life

who were there for one common purpose was

overwhelming!

The military was honored,

those who had given their lives in this war

and in other wars

were honored

and civilians who were living an example

of Faith, Hope and Love

were honored.

The mood was decidedly uplifiting and encouraging.

No one was bashed.

No political lines were drawn in the sand.

We were a mixed lot of Americans

standing together for the purpose of restoring our country

back to her roots.

To return to the founding principles

of our forefathers

and to turn our hearts back to God.

I don't think I have ever seen

a larger gathering of people

anywhere else!

Based on the land mass covered

there were at least a half a million

people there!

The line just to get metro tickets into Washington

was thousands deep at 7 am when David and I

first attempted to get our tickets

at the New Carrollton station.

We ended up driving in to Suitland, MD

where David works and got right on the

metro station there with no trouble at all.
It was a long and exhausting day

but it was so awesome to be there

and to be a part of an event that

I believe in!

Honk if you're an insensitive jerk!

So it's back to school week here in

Anne Arundel County.

Lots of little backpacks and lunch boxes,

knee socks and brand new shoes.

Tearful moms stand at the bus stop as

the big yellow beast roars to a stop.

The door squeaks open revealing

a metal stairway leading to

exciting new discoveries.

Nervous kindergartners cling to mom's hand

for just one more minute before

boarding the bus that will take them

to brick buildings full of construction paper,

scissors and glue.

The beginning of what will be 12 more years

of first days.

That classic scene is played over

year after year in towns and cities

all over America.

That first week of school is a sacred,

time honored tradition.

A milestone

that is part of the cadence of

American family life.

It's familiar,

it's special,

it's endearing.

Right?

Apparently not to everyone.
Someone got up a few minutes too late
yesterday morning,
threw on their suit,
chugged down their coffee,
grabbed their keys and ran out to their BMW.
Because of their own lack of planning,
they are now in a raging hurry to get to
wherever it is they need to be at 7:35 in the morning.
God help anyone who stands in their way
or delays them further.
Unfortunately, this person ended up behind a school bus.
And the classic scene was lost on him.
He didn't see the cute knee socks or the shiny mary janes.
He didn't smile at the little girl with the bouncy pigtails
who needed just one more hug from mom
before boarding the bus.
All he saw was the clock and
how inconvenienced he was.
He layed on his horn and kept a steady note
until every kid was on that bus
and every mom was robbed of that
sweet first day photo of their child
shedding the final layer of babyhood and
smiling back from the steps
of their future.
Unbelievable!!
This story was relayed to me by Brendell's bus driver
yesterday morning.
This morning Brendell, Journey and I
went out to meet the bus.
When it came to a stop at our driveway
the bus driver jumped out of her seat,
leaned out of the door
and gave Journey a doggy treat.
That's when the honking began.
First one, then two, then a long steady note.
The bus driver was already back in position before Brendell
was even properly seated!
The entire exchange probably took less than
15 seconds!
Seriously people,
if you can't wait 15 seconds for a moment of human kindness
something is wrong with your priorities!
Would 15 extra seconds actually get you down the road
that much quicker?
How about leave the house a full minute early
tomorrow,
then you'd have a whole 45 seconds to spare!
Heck, you could watch three bus boardings
with that kind of time!
Let this be a reminder to drivers everywhere.
School is back in session,
plan accordingly!
And while your at it
maybe taking a few seconds to relive
the joy and mystery of childhood
will help lower your blood pressure enough
for you to handle the interstate
where the big boys play!
*
Vent over.....
we will return to our normally upbeat,
happy, heart warming
blog shortly.

The Gift...

To all the cool moms and aunts

out there,

this one is for you!

To those who sacrificed a clean floor
for toothless smiles,
finished laundry for
contagious giggles
and rainy indoor days
for zainy outdoor memories.....

Thank you!!!



It is because of you that some of us
have grown up holding experiences
and relationships
more precious than possessions.



It is through your willingness
to let us express our creativity
that we now feel free to be creative.



We know we left marks on your walls
and mud on your floor,
but you left much more indelible impressions
on our hearts.



Things like laughter, acceptance,
freedom, love, joy,
discernment between what is a big thing
and what is a small thing.
You gave us memories that we cling to
even today as we watch our own kids grow.

You put within our hearts

a longing to give our children

the same gift you gave us.

Permission to be a kid.

to get dirty,

to laugh until we couldn't breath,

to build tents in living rooms that you

just straightend up,

to paint pinecones

and picture frames

to jump in mud puddles

and in piles of leaves

to roast marshmellows,

carve our initials in trees

and hunt for aliens in the backyard.

I know I've said it before

but it is such a blessing to get to know

these kids!

Nylah and Emerson are my cousin Leah's children.

Being with them has filled my summer with nostalgia.

Watching them run through the same

enchanted woods that their mother and I ran through

is a gift beyond words.

This summer I have discovered that

I have the opportunity to

be what I longed for.

I have the chance to create bonds between

my kids and their cousins

just like the precious bonds that were

fostered during my childhood.
And the best part is that I'm sure

I'm getting the greater reward!

Not only do I get to rest in the comfort of the past,

but I get to experience the discovery of the present!

And that, my friends,

beats a squeaky clean house

and perfectly folded laundry

any day!

10 steps

I think I have blogger's block.

Have you heard of it?

I actually googled it to see

what the world wide web had to say about it

and I found this link.

Who knew there was a 10 step program

to cure one's lack of creativity or inspiration

and who knew that there was a name

for sitting down at the computer and

either writing a bunch of incoherent sentences

and hitting delete

or just staring blankly at the screen

wondering what happened to your mojo!

I relate particularly to number 1 and number 6.

Number 5 must be for special personality types

whose brains work at dawn.

I'm curious to try number 7

although when I read the word "HitTail"

the last thing I think of is blogging.

I don't even want to google that!

So armed with these ideas and suggestions

I'm hoping to find my way out of "blogger's block".

In the meantime,

we've had such a full summer.

It baffles me that I have lacked the ability to write

creatively about everything we've done!

We were able to experience so many things

and made so many memories.

So, to catch you up

and to save myself from trying to blog about each event,

I thought I'd just post highlight photos.

So here ya go...

the summer of 2010!

The Linkous family visited us from Georgia

and we went to Washington DC for the day.

We also went to Six Flags!

We went to Pennsylvania

and picked out a puppy

from an impossibly cute litter

of Austalian Shepherds.

We brought Journey home on July 18th!

I had the joy of watching my cousin Leah's two kids

a few days a week this summer.

It was so wonderful to watch Brendell bond

with Emerson and Nylah!

Of course Summer in Maryland would not be complete without

a few crab feasts!!

We celebrated my favorite holiday

family style at
Fort Meade army base.

More fun with the cousins!

We also went to Hershey Park in PA

with Leah and her family!

We had a redneck picnic

in the Hershey Park Parking lot!

We went to Ocean City, MD

for a week with my mom and grandma.

Kenzie visited from Seattle!

As this Summer draws to an end,

and before the rush of Fall begins,

it is nice just to sit and reflect

on all of the special moments we had together in the sun.
It has been a summer of reunion for me.

I've reconnected in person

with a childhood friend, two high school friends,

a family from Georgia that feels like blood,

and lots of cousins who I never really knew

other than by name.

Maybe I'm wrong in thinking that I

have not been inspired.

Maybe I've been too overwhelmed with inspiration

that it all kinda jumbles up

and refuses to come out in coherent sentences.

I should google "inspiration overload"

and see if it cancels out intelligent thoughts!

Whatever it is,

it's nice to know that there are 10 steps

to figuring this all out.

Don't ya wish all of life's challenges

could be solved so easily?